Can You Trust Me Now? Good!

Have you ever felt like you're on one of those Verizon Wireless commercials with God? We're fine with trusting God when suddennly a kink is thrown in our plans and God asks "Can you trust me now?" Life eventually gets back to normal, we learn to trust God yet again and then a wrench is thrown into our plans, yet again, and we hear the refrain, yet again: "Can you trust me now?"

Somehow, our dreams and plans never quite turn out the way we want them to. We try to be resourceful and save money, but our car breaks down and the repairs cost more than the car. We apply for a job we're sure is perfect, and it falls through. We would like to have kids or be married, but we're infertile or we still haven't met Mr. Right. We try to live a healthy lifestyle, but learn that we have an illness, disease, or cancer. The list could go on. Everyone has stories of broken and lost dreams.

But what does God want us to do with these broken dreams? At times, I can become bitter and angry at God. When this happens, He and I have an all-out argument about how unfair He is to let this aweful thing happen to me, and I wallow in self-pity. For some reason, though, it's not long before he crashes my pity party. "Who is this that darkens my counsel with words without knowledge?....Where were you when I laid the earth's foundations?....Have you ever given orders to the morning, or shown the dawn its place...?" (Job 38:2,4a,12). "For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways" (Isaiah 55:8). To my chagrin, he reminds me, "In his heart a man plans his course, but the LORD determines his steps" (Proverbs 16:9) and reassures me "Do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink, or about your body, what you will wear....But seek first His kingdom and His righteouseness and all these things will be added unto you." (Matthew 6 portions). And he reassures me that he will "turn the darkness into light before [me] and make the rough places smooth. These are the things I will do; I will not forsake [you]" (Isaiah 42:16).

But I still have the tendency to go back to my general belief that godly life = happy life. That if I'm serving God, I'll have a good life and even deserve a good life. Yet I don't think that's the perspective God wants us to have. In fact, scripture suggests the opposite--we should "count it all joy" in suffering and broken dreams because it means "God is treating you as sons. For what son is not disciplined by his father?" (Hebrews 12:7) We should rejoice that this is an opportunity to develop character such as perseverance. "Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything" (James 1:4). In a weird, almost twisted sense, trials actually mean that God cares for us deeply because he won't let us remain in our current sinful state; He's sanctifying us.

If you're like me, this probably doesn't completely give you peace about difficulties. It's not like we go around saying, "Yes! I lost my job! This is a santification moment!" Sometimes I tell God "enough with the sanctification! Can't you let me be?!"

Yet God promises that we will never be alone in the midst of the difficulties, and that does give me peace. When my dreams are shattered, God prompts me to pull out my favorite Collegiate Devotional Bible that looks just as battered as I feel, and I flip through all of the underlined promises. "You meant it for evil, but God meant it for good" (Genesis 50:20). "1 But now, this is what the LORD says-- he who created you, O Jacob, he who formed you, O Israel: "Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; you are mine. 2 When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze. 3 For I am the LORD, your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior; I give Egypt for your ransom, Cush and Seba in your stead" (Isaiah 43:1-3). "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose" (Romans 8:28). "We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; persecuted, but not abaondoned; struck down, but not destroyed; perplexed, but not in despair" (2 Cor. 4:8). God promises strength, peace, comfort, hope, and Himself during trials.

When I read these and other promises, I can't help but want to trust God. I am comforted in knowing that while my circumstances and emotions change, God never does. To borrow Annie Flint's words, "His love has no limits, His grace has no measure, His power no boundary known unto men; For out of His infinite riches in Jesus, He giveth, and giveth, and giveth again." That's the kind of God I can trust.

So lesson learned. I can trust you, God. I said to myself, almost finished with my blog. Then true story, my Internet crashed and I thought I lost everything I'd written. I had to chuckle, though. God must be smiling down from heaven, saying, "Can you trust me now? Good!"

Stone Uncast: A Short Explanation

"Why don't you tell those Jewish kids they're going to hell?!" a classmate once asked me in high school. Several classmates around me were shocked at this statement, and I myself was taken aback. But then I understood.

Too often, Christians have the reputation that they are superior to everyone else. And in my short time period of life interacting with various people, I have to say that often WE ARE stuck up, arrogant, and self-centered. But the thing I wished that this classmate could see was that we are not perfect because we are Christians; rather, we are Christians because we are imperfect. The whole story of the gospel is that we in and of ourselves cannot make ourselves perfect, though we try. "It is only by grace that we have been saved, and this is not of us--it is the gift of God so that no one can boast!"

One of my favorite passages comes from Hosea 2 where the Lord speaks to Israel as Hosea should speak to his unfaithful wife, Gomer. Israel has been unfaithful to the Lord, and now she is in the dessert. During those days, when one was taken to the desert, and especially when found guilty of committing adultery, it meant that the person was to be stoned to death. Yet the Lord says "I will speak tenderly to her....I will be her God, and she will be my people...I will betroth her to me in righteousness..." And what a picture it is when Jesus is in the same scenario many years later! The rulers and elders of the law try to trap Jesus into stoning the adulteress woman. And his response? Let he who has not sinned cast the first stone. Yet even sinless Jesus does not cast the first stone. This amazing picture of grace and forgiveness is my 'story and song' as I am a sinner who greatly needs a Savior!

With this in mind, I write to share honest, Lord-willing humble thoughts about life, Christianity, and the great grace that causes me to rejoice. I am a product of the stone uncast.